Saturday, April 28, 2007

The Midwest Keeps Churning Them OUT!

Lending further support to my constant claims that the best people in the world come from the Midwest, is Jenna Fischer - the actress who plays Pam Beesly on my current obsession "The Office".

Jenna hails from St. Louis, plays Pam to understated perfection, and writes a totally adorable blog on Pam Beesly's MySpace page. I just read the BEST blog entry Jenna wrote, about her experience (along with some advice) getting started in acting. Growing up in the Midwest encouraged me to live in a bullshit-free zone (theoretically speaking), I positively cheered her story about a total piece-of-shit playwright, and I LOVE that she named him. Sometimes I think you need to name names. I'm still dying to know who the smarmy producer was who tried to get Sharon Stone to sleep with him, early in her career - total casting couch story. She wouldn't name names. Dammit. Here is the excerpt from Jenna's blog:

For example, it was my first year in town and I was part of a theater group. At a party for a new play opening the playwright came up to me and asked me if I was an actress. I said yes. He asked if I was interested in doing a part in his new movie. I was kind of floored. How did he know I was any good? I said, "What is it about?" And he said, "Well, you'd have to do a raunchy sex scene with nudity. Would that bother you?" I laughed and said, "I wouldn't do anything I wouldn't be proud to show my parents." He then said, "That was a test. You aren't a real actress. A real actress would never say that. A real actress would piss herself onstage if the part called for it. You aren't going to make it in this town. You should just go home." And then he walked away. I went back to my apartment and cried. Why was Shem Bitterman (that is his real name) such a dick? I have no idea. Stuff like that will happen to you if you decide to become an actor. People will roll their eyes when you tell them what you do. You have to develop a thick skin - without becoming jaded, guarded or cynical. That's a tall order. I'll say now what I wish I had said then, "Shem, sir, with all due respect, you are a fuckface and you can kiss my ass."

I not only love that she named Shem Bitterman (who, unfortunately, may also be from the Midwest...he went to U. of Iowa...must not have been properly cooked), I love that she said "fuckface". Perfectly acceptable, as she DID say "with all due respect". Although, with a name like "Bitter man", I am not sure there was much hope for him to grow up to be a charming individual. He should not be confused with the Pearl Jam song "Better Man". I liked to sing that as "Butter Mints". Can't find the butter miiiiiiiiiiints. Can't find the butter miiiiiiiiiiiiiints.

So, while I would love to attach a link that goes straight to the entire blog, we all know I am not web-savvy enough to pull that off. Lo siento. So here is a link to Pam/Jenna's MySpace page: http://www.myspace.com/pambeesley

If you are not watching "The Office" on Thursday nights, you must be asking yourself "do I really NEED to laugh so hard that whatever I'm drinking comes out my nose?" The answer should always be "YES".