Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Brazilian Grande

When traveling, I do my best to support the local economies. That's just the kind of philanthropic girl I am. Supporting/shopping, potato/potahto.

Things I bought in Brazil:

  • Multiple caipirinhas

  • Snacks - this great peanut, carmelized sugar snacky thing - I still have dreams about it

  • Skimpy red dress (skirt/top)
As I mentioned previously, when traveling, I like to blend in. In Brazil, this skirt/top thing was blending. In Seattle, it is glaring, and if I wore it outside of my apartment, I would likely be arrested. This was one of those purchases that absolutely does not translate "back home". But, as traveler/shoppers know, it is very easy to be lulled into the false sense of attire-familiarity, and think "This is GREAT, and I will absolutely wear it at home!" Stupid foreign-shopping goggles. I imagine the shopping goggles look something like this:

And another purchase that would be likely to get me arrested:

  • Skimpy red bikini - "skimpy" is the only flavor that Brazilian bikinis come in. Even when you try to buy a little more coverage by purchasing a Grande (large) bottom. No such thing. I think Grande in Portuguese just means "the side ties are longer, but your ass will still be quite visible". This is pretty much the size of my Brazilian Grande bikini.

It is, unfortunately, not the size of my American Grande booty, and I did not look anything like that on the beaches of Brazil.

Luckily, for everyone, Herb has this habit of chewing on straps, and strings on garments. Needless to say, beaches everywhere (and the spectators at Hi Five's pool) are safe from my Brazilian Grande, as the straps have been carefully gnawed off by a concerned citizen.

Shop carefully, travelers. Shop carefully.